Anyone who reads my writing knows I love to clarify anything that can be misunderstood or twisted. Anyone who has read my writing or watched any of our #SONdayBlessing videos knows I love, cherish, respect and honor my wife. I consider us to be equals in our marriage and I am fully aware of God telling us in 1 Peter that we are to honor our wives, and not doing so can hinder our prayers…
1 Peter 3:7 (NKJV)
7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.
I am fully aware and happily accept the husband’s responsibility to love our wives as Christ loves the church. This is the sacrificial love that’s is defined in Ephesians…
Ephesians 5:25-29 (NKJV)
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. 28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church.
That being said, now let us consider what the word of God says in 1 Corinthians Chapter 11…
1 Corinthians 11:8-9 (NKJV)
8 For man is not from woman, but woman from man. 9 Nor was man created for the woman, but woman for the man.
I feel that each husband should treat his wife as if she is his QUEEN, and vice versa. However, anyone who believes the bible is the word of God knows what God said before He created woman…
Genesis 2:18 (NKJV)
18 And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”
God created man to be the head. But, as my father-in-law Pastor Lonnie Black has said for years…
“God created man to be the head and not the headache.” Pastor Lonnie Black
We live in a society today that more and more behaves as if man was created for woman than woman for man…that the husband is to submit to his wife, rather than woman submit to her husband. It’s God’s will that they honor one another.
In contemporary America today the husband is expected to ‘answer to his wife’…to go out of his way to make her happy…to work himself to the bone in order to get her whatever she wants…to submit to her when there is a disagreement…that if a woman allows her husband to ‘tell her what to do’ she is being weak. And, that if a husband isn’t giving his wife everything she desires, he is less than a husband.
Television, film, music and especially reality shows and social media support this (Think of all the “HOUSEWIVES” shows…there’s one to target various cultures). It’s art imitating life and art further shaping behavior and the narrative of male/female relationships.
In a sense, we have made our QUEENS…KINGS.
Marriage is not 50/50, it’s 100/100. It’s woman submitting to her husband’s authority in the home and enjoying his covering and protection. But, at the same time, marriage is the husband not abusing his authority, and considering his wife as an equal in all decisions. However, when decisions are made in the home, God will hold the husband (head) accountable…especially in regard to worship being established.
If you haven’t already, step back and take a look at what’s on television, movies and social media. Listen to much of the popular music these days. Listen to many of the conversations. Many people have gone beyond treating wives like QUEENS, to making them KINGS.
Husbands and wives…let’s be good to one another. Let’s love, trust, honor and support one another, but let’s not forget God’s order.