I recently heard two successful businessmen, on separate occasions, ‘joke’ about being away from home so much. They both eluded to fact that their families are actually glad when they ARE NOT at home, and dread seeing them return. It reminded me of someone confessing to me years ago that some days, they wished their spouse would have a fatal accident on the way home…they have a strong happy marriage today though.
Family life, whether it’s just two, but especially if there’s several people in the house can be challenging. No matter what’s going on, what energy to you bring into the house…positive or negative?
Everyone brings negativity and dysfunction SOMETIMES, but at TIMES it’s SOME more than others. It can cause people who genuinely love one another to dread seeing each other.
Dad or mom may be grumpy…for whatever reason…
Husband or wife neglecting responsibilities…
The children may be unappreciative or feel neglected…
The siblings may feel one is favored over the other…
Someone in the family responding too harshly…
The daily challenges of work, school and life may be brought home…
Arguments might end without apologies or closure…
Unspoken grievances and complaints with one another fester…
Personal flaws, faults and idiosyncrasies cause harsh feelings towards one another.
For whatever reason, good or bad, justified or unjustified…sometimes each of us can be very hard to live with. Sometimes we ALL can make home life unpleasant. It can become a vicious cycle of responses to behavior that no one even remembers where it started.
This is why sometimes people may either say, or quietly think to themselves, Wow! It sure is more peaceful in the house when ________________ isn’t at home!
Love (just like God’s unselfish, sacrificial love) is the glue that holds families together, and love is always most powerful as a VERB rather than a NOUN.
Real love isn’t just when we are laughing, joking and treasuring one another, but when we are stretching one another’s patience to the limit. When we dread confronting one another, when we are at odds, but still want to be around one another. Real love is being the one who can stop the vicious cycle of reactions to bad behavior with good behavior.
God has solutions in His word to help encourage peace and harmony in the home, and he leaves all of us responsible and accountable. Here are a few scriptures that I have pulled that should relate to everyone…of course this is not exhaustive. There are many more scriptures and accounts in the bible to teach us how to have peace in the house and enjoy one another. Read the verses, if anything applies to you, do your part to keep peace in your house, and remember that 1 Peter 4:8 teaches us, “Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since LOVE COVERS A MULTITUDE OF SINS”. And, that 1 Corinthians 13:8 exhorts that “LOVE NEVER FAILS…”
When our relationships fail, it’s not because love has failed, it’s because we failed love.
1 Peter 3:7
7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them(wives) with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.
1 Peter 3:1-2
Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,2 when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.
1 Corinthians 7:2-5
Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. 3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: 3 “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.” 4 And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.
1 Timothy 5:8
8 But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
32 And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.